I received more Birthday giftage tonight when we went, for a fourth attempt, to watch The Last Samurai. I'm pleased to say that this was a more successful venture than the previous ones. The film was good. Marred only by the cheese. I'm speaking not only of the rather cheesy 'I'm Tom Cruise' moments (bless him), but the altogether less adorable cheesiness of Nacho Man!
Sweet Jebus, won't you tell me why you make cinema food so noisy? Not only noisy but with a vomit inducing aroma that stains the air for hours on end. Surely cinema snacks should be fluffy and light and not designed to piss off everyone else in the fucking audience!
I swear, Nacho Man was sorting his chips before he dunked them. Then, when he'd consumed his chip-fest, he proceeded to lick the liquid cheese out of the pot! THEN! Then the chillies must've affected his sinuses because he spent roughly half an hour snorting lung butter!! He was rolling it in the back of his throat!
I would have at thee, Nacho Man! I would have at thee with a passion!
I'm going to stroke my frog... and think happy thoughts...