February 28th, 2003

flesh

Rub me ragged

Yeah, so, you know what's a really fucking stupid idea? I'll tell you. A horror movie marathon with a subtley recurring medical theme, that's what. I spent about 10 hours watching delights ranging from Hellraiser: Inferno to the intensely shite Voodoo Academy. All alone. In the dark.

I've been on an intense creative burst of late and my mind's been burning twice as bright. It's like someone's overclocked me... Inferno got me going! It's the kind of subtle, implied horror that creative minds like mine shouldn't be exposed to. Seriously, feed my brain the wrong sort of candy and it'll flip out something rotten. It's both a blessing and a curse.

So that was yesterday. I now bring you forward to today; early afternoon: I was in the hospital, I was looking for a Coke; wandering aimlessly around the endless corridors. Turn left, empty corridor, turn around, empty corridor. Empty branch to the right. Alone. Fuzzy greenish lighting. Alone. Overclocked brain. Alone... time to freak out!! And, damn, did I do a good job! My brain started leaking images of mucho hack and slash violence. It started hinting at what might be waiting in store in behind one of the many nameless doors that lined the walls. It kept saying: you might stumble across something you shouldn't see. You might... yeah. Erm, it wasn't pretty. It was like being a kid again. Being a kid who wakes up in the middle of night and knows exactly what kind of nasty shit lies in wait in the shadows.

It probably has a lot to do with the stuff i'm dealing with right now. Probably all the intensely vile things i've seen happening to someone I love. Probably. Anyways, I found my Coke. I found cheap Coke. 10 pence cheaper than anywhere else in the hospital. 10 pence. The price of sanity.