RJ Brudenell (azoth) wrote,
RJ Brudenell
azoth

Six until six...

I woke up at 6am today with a strange tingle lurking at the base of my brain. That tingle grew and spread as I tried to snooze but eventually it forced me out of bed.

By 7am I was shaved and showered and half-starved. There was no food in the fridge so I headed down to the 24 hour Tesco to grab a big, greasy breakfast and some much need groceries.

All well and good.

By 12pm I was in Nottingham City Centre browsing the posh clothing stores and grunting at the fact that I couldn't afford anything. Hell, even a quick trip to H&M resulted in me coming out empty handed (note to self: acquire cash). Anyways, after a few minutes spent lurking around the Marks & Spencer food court fawning after sushi I decided it was probably best to head home.

All well and good.

Taking a slightly discursive route home I took a quick trip to the out of town retail parks to pick up some more cat litter. Two 5kg bags to be exact. I hefted them into the back of the car and made my way to the drivers seat. I turned the key in the ignition and... all of the doors locked. Naturally, I was confused by this. The situation then worsened, however, as the car alarm decided to spark into life. Then the immobiliser decided to kick in. The doors wouldn't open, the engine wouldn't start, the alarm was blaring and I was trapped inside with a gradually increasing audience.

All was not well and all was not good.

Ten minutes of 'failing to escape' later, whilst the alarm gently tore through my ear-drums, I managed to encourage the electric windows to open a few inches. I then asked a member of my audience to take the keys and open the door for me. He was a wonderfully helpful gentleman and, as it turned out, he was my rescuer. I thank you, strange man. Blessings to you and your spawn whatever they be.

So, yes, it worked. The door was grudging at first but it eventually gave in. Oh, and, as you would expect, the second I stepped out of the car the alarm switched off. Much to the delight of the entire staff of Petsmart. Isn't that just a peachy-keen kick in the nuts!

Still, I made it home without incident.

Touch wood.

We're now heading back out to look into buying my Gran a head-stone.

Hmmm. Getting back in the car. Let's just hope I make it out unscathed... Wait, does a pine laminate from IKEA really count as touching wood?
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